I wonder if this will kill me

twilight flyer

I have a new collection of paintings up at Twilight Gallery in West Seattle! Opening night is Friday, Oct 2nd, from 6-9pm and the show will be up until October 31.

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I was in a car accident two years ago. I keep thinking back to it, only seeing it a split second before it happened. Disbelief. No fear, just surprise. I hit the breaks and closed my eyes and let it happen. Force. Noise. I thought,

wow.

I wonder if this will kill me…

I did not see that coming…

huh.

When I came to I was afraid to move. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to. I couldn’t see anything because the car was full of dust from the airbags. After a bit I moved my head first, slowly, side to side. I didn’t feel pain, which freaked me out. I moved my fingers and toes. Disbelief again. I started to hurt once I got out of the car. Then more in the ER. And for a brief bit I couldn’t read, or make words come out of my mouth in the correct order. I just wanted to go home.

I broke my collarbone and got to experience the joy that is whiplash. “Whiplash” sounds so benign, right? I thought so. Sounds cute, even.

Death’s been on my mind. I’ve been dreaming about it, always thinking, “huh, I thought it would be more painful. This really isn’t so bad.” But the crash didn’t kill me; it wasn’t even that serious. And it wasn’t painless. Physical therapy hurt. My neck is still recovering. Sometimes, when I lay really still, mostly in the mornings when I’m still in bed and just barely awake, I can’t feel it at all. And I lay there, curled up, feeling what it’s like to be in this body. I always liked sleeping in, but had never appreciated it this much.

It occurs to me that there are emotional crashes, and those can also stick you with whiplash. I feel residual sadness, and like with my physical injury I don’t do my exercises – even though I should, cuz it hurts. So this art is my way of tugging at old wounds, stretching out and gnawing over old heartbreak and disappointment, using vague images of my body as the language. The materials are simple, and straightforward: one color of oil paint on bleak birch panels. I’m trying to create a portrait of longing, of a fleeting, anonymous stillness. I am remembering sadness.

For three of these paintings I used a model other than myself: the beautiful Justyn Rebecca, an incredible photographer currently based in New Zealand (Muse, Handful, Curl 2).

Cover

“Cover” 30×30,” oil on wood panel

Curl 2“Curl 2″ 12×16,” oil on wood panel

Fold “Fold” 30×30,” oil on wood panel

Handful“Handful” 8×10,” oil on wood panel

Home“Home” 12×16,” oil on wood panel

Introvert“Introvert” 20×24,” oil on wood panel

Pine“Pine” 12×16,” oil on wood panel

Tuck“Tuck” 30×30,” oil on wood panel

Whiplash 3“Whiplash 3″ 20×24,” oil on wood panel

I tried to keep this collection of work simple, only working with one tube of paint and four brushes. I primed the wood panels with clear gesso, and painted the pieces directly onto the wood, without sketching or transferring drawings first. Once dry, I gave the pieces a protective coating of varnish.

New Work at Sassafras for Belltown Art Walk!

Woah! It’s September already? What happened?!?! This is only three days away, but here it is: I’ve got some new inked girls up at Sassafras for the next month, and opening night is during the Belltown Artwalk, this Friday, September 11th from 6-9pm.

If you haven’t been to Sassafras (and even if you have, of course!) do stop by. They are great. On the corner of 1st Ave and Bell St, at 2307 1st Ave. We’ll have wine! Do come!

flyeri love noodles_sample

“I Love Noodles!”

bad hair day_sample

“Bad Hair Day”

 

30 Day Art Challenge!

Whew! With a couple of hours to spare, I’ve completed the thirty 8×10″ paintings for this year’s 30 Day Art Challenge.

all 30 smI chose to paint burlesque girls for the entire 30 pieces. I wanted to use a lot of color, make some cheerful, sassy and frilly art, and well, the research is just plain fun!

all paintingsWhile for most of the pieces I used bits and pieces of photo reference, I also got the amazing opportunity to paint Lolo Ramone, who visited my studio and modeled for five paintings! She came prepared with a Mary Poppin’s bag of props: parasols, garter-belts, corsets, hair accessories a boa and an exquisite burnt velvet tasseled robe.

tiny burlesque 11

Some pieces, while perhaps not exactly “burlesque” took a more circus-y theme. Perhaps a side effect of really getting into the current season of American Horror Story. This strong woman is one of my favorites!tiny burlesque 10

Lolo Ramone.

tiny burlesque 9

Um, Sherlock?

tiny burlesque 8

Ringmaster.

tiny burlesque 7

Snake Charmer.

tiny burlesque 6

“Moira” A sea-faring beauty.

tiny burlesque 5

“Posey”

tiny burlesque 4

“Mimi”

tiny burlesque 3

“Suzy Spacegirl”

tiny burlesque 2

This is pretty much what my studio’s looked like for the past couple weeks: it needs a tidying super bad.studio

My pieces, along with the collections of over 100 other artists (!! That equals over 3000 separate art pieces!!) will be on show for one night only, mark your calendars! December 4th, during the Pioneer Square artwalk, from 5-10pm. Art will all be priced the same at $50, and will sell off the walls, so be sure to get there early so you don’t miss out! 🙂 Hope to see you there.

30 day art challenge will

This week: Never, Stargazing, and Inktober

neverFirst things first: tomorrow, Tuesday Oct. 14th, Never debuts in Seattle on the big screen! Back in 2012, I helped create a T-shirt design and poster/cover for the film.

9:15 PM
@SIFF Cinema Egyptian
801 East Pine Street, Seattle, WA 98122

Get your ticket(s) here: http://slgff.strangertickets.com/films/17910552/never

From the Facebook page:

Never is the story of Denim (Zachary Booth), a twenty-something who moves to Seattle and falls in love with a struggling, gay singer-songwriter named Nikki (Zelda Williams). And as their resulting friendship blossoms and complicates, it will challenge and redefine their understanding of love and modern relationships. 

 

Second things second: Wednesday, Oct. 15th is opening night for my new show, Stargazing, at Solo Bar, 200 Roy St., Suite 104, Seattle. Yay! If you’re in the area, do drop on by!

flyer

Third in news: for the first time, I’m participating in the Inktober challenge! This involves simply (hah!) creating one ink drawing each day for the month of October. I’ve been using a brush and ink in my new toned-paper sketchbook (I love it so!), and mostly doing the drawings around 10 – 11pm, before crawling into bed, but for 12 days now I’ve pretty much kept to it, and I’m pretty proud of them.

sm oct 5  sm oct 7

sm oct 9

sm oct 11

sm oct 12You’ll notice I don’t have all the drawings up – that’d be a little image heavy. I have, however, been uploading them to my Instagram account. 🙂

Okay, that’s all for now, but I’ll be back soon! Thanks for sticking with me!!

STELLAR: Evidence of an alternative space program

postcard2

Oh my god. How is 2014 already halfway over? More importantly (to me, anyway!) – how is my solo art show at Twilight gallery opening in only eight days?! I am soooo excited – there will be paintings of planets, starscapes, unnamed cosmonauts and floaty space girls. You are officially invited! If you are a facebooker, here is the invite page.

This weekend I’ll be into the gallery to paint the walls black, and any day now my bags of glow-in-the-dark stars will be showing up in my mail. To be used on the gallery walls, of course, but which after the show I’m sure will all go straight up in the apartment walls.

cosmonaut 010 sm

Why am I devoting a whole set of drawings and paintings to this franky, naive and arguably overdone subject?

What I’m after – childish wonder, stark beauty, vast loneliness + absurd simplicity. Exploration, finding comfort in the unknown + active curiosity.

I’m not a scientist, or an astronaut, this collection is just a portrait of what I thought being a space explorer was like, when I was 10.

I have this desire to touch emptiness, embrace the nonsensical, and lose a sense of proportion. Gadgets, physics, magic… all that good stuff!

I aim to create a portrait of an innocent motivation to seek comfort and wonder in the unknown.

Luna 8_small

cosmonaut 013 sm

cosmonaut 014 sm  postcard

If you are in the vicinity, please come by for opening night! There may be space-themed cocktails. And there may be spacemen/women. YOU should definitely come dressed in your finest intergalactical gear. 🙂